Archive for February, 2012

The Gospel According to Apostle Fred

February 29, 2012

So I’m sitting there on the couch one Sunday morning, minding my business the way I usually do. I was flipping through the religious channel (not really trying to make trouble, just seeing what was on) and stumbled across Fred K. C. Price, one of the Alpha Pimps. He operates out of California; uses the Ever Increasing Faith Ministries as his main income stream.

As I watch the television, the man says that Jesus died spiritually in the Garden of Gethsemane. He went on to say that our sins were paid for in the Garden and not on the cross since the whole thing is about spiritual stuff not physical stuff.

So let’s see if I understand. Since Jesus’ death on the cross was physical, that only took care of our physical circumstances. You know, it gave us access to physical health. But since sin is a spiritual matter, it took his spiritual death to pay for our sins. Of course Ken Copeland (and John K. Jenkins, the senior pastor at First Baptist Church of Glenarden on the Kettering) says that Jesus suffered in hell for our sins – same reason. Then Copeland and Creflo go on to say that Jesus is the first born again man.

It doesn’t matter that the Bible says that our sins were nailed to the cross, not some rock in Gethsemane (Col 2:14). It doesn’t matter that the Bible says that we were reconciled to God through His broken body (Eph 2:16; Col 1:20). All that matters is people follow him and not Jesus Christ, that they believe what he says and not what the Bible says.

Think about it, if people at the Ever Increasingly False ministries actually believed the truth, they would be able to cast an increasingly discerning eye upon the things he and his son say. Then they would leave.

Candy of Eye, Not Woman of God

February 25, 2012

You’ve heard of the Pimps of the Houston Beltway right? I’m talking about I. V. and Bridgette Hilliard. They run a scam, dressed up like a church, down in Houston Texas. Several years ago they had a most excellent idea: throw a birthday party for First Lady/Co-pastor/Whatever-She-Is Bridgette and rake in a whole lot of money from the sycophants. She even provided a list of preferred gifts.

From the photos and some of the first-hand accounts of the shindig, things went rather well. A lot of people paid to see them and be seen with them. To add to the value, the now-Apostle Fred Price was there and available for souvenir photos.

Not one to let a good idea go to waste, Dr. Medina Pullings, operating out of Richmond Virginia, has announced a birthday celebration. Take a look at a screen shot of the “invite”. She even gives the sheeple the opportunity to, how does she phrase it? give an on-line love offering or even bring a present.

First, just a couple of questions.

1. What has she done that we should celebrate her life? Have you heard her…Holy Ghost Powered…preaching? Click here and give it a listen.

2. Why not celebrate Elizabeth Elliot’s life? Don’t know Elizabeth Eliott? Click on her name. Why not celebrate the life of Stephen, you know, one of the deacons who was stoned for presenting the Gospel to a bunch of stiff-necked religionists.

There are tons of women out there who are women of God, whose lives have made a difference in the Kingdom. Some we know of, some we don’t. We could start with Phoebe (Romans 16) and move all the way forward to Edith Schaeffer and others. But Medina? Again, what has she done?

Rather than a woman of God, she is quite simply candy of Eye.

Her preaching is, at best, vacuous. She gives more attention to her appearance than she apparently does to the word of God. And let’s face it, she got her doctorate from Pimp U. The following photo shows you some of the fine pimps preachers who have graduated from that fine institution for the mere price of $3600 dollars. A good pimp can collect that much during high praise with no problem. And yes, the banner is virtually a who’s who of pimps and pimpettes.

Bottom line, she is a pimpette out to get as much as she can from the foolish sheeple as possible.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. If any of you want to bless me with a love offering, say a 2012 Cessna with a glass panel or even a used SR-20, be my guest. My Vastly Overpriced Webmaster hasn’t quite figured out the on-line giving thing, but that’s fine. You can send all love offerings to:

Melvin Jones

12456 Anathema Lane

Bowie, MD 20876

None of the gifts are tax deductible (yet). But I promise you you’ll get a powerful blessing from Gawd if you give to the Mand of Gawd (i.e. me).

The Peggy Update

February 20, 2012


As most of my formerly regular readers are aware, two years ago my wife fell down the stairs in our house. I heard the bumping from the den. When I came around the corner, she was laying at the bottom of the stairs, sort of crumpled up, semiconscious.

She couldn’t move -anything. And her skin burned whenever I touched her. I called 911 and, over her protestations, called for an ambulance.

By the way, this happened in the middle of Snowmaggedon, the year we got mroe than 25 inches of snow dumped on us in two separate blizzards.

Fortunately, I had cleared the driveway. There was a neat path up to the house when the EMTs got there. Getting her down to the ambulance was easy. Unfortunately, the abulance got stuck and I had to use my snowblower to dig it out.

We spent three days at Prince Georges Medical Center (I bullied my way into staying with her in the intensive care unit) and slept over the next couple of nights once she was moved into a room.

Then we went to rehab. As much as I want to say “Oh yeah. I knew God was going to heal her,” I was pretty much scared to death. It was days before she could move her hands. It was several more days before she could hold a spoon and actually get the food in her mouth. And even then she had have a special attachment on the spoon to use it.

About five weeks later we came home. She was, at best, marginally mobile. She needed help to get to the bathroom. It took us forever to get down the steps. It took us even longer to get up the steps. Oh, and by the way, the fall exacerbated her Multiple Sclerosis, causing her to have short spells of spasticity when her legs and hands absolutely refused to work.

Now, for the most part she can walk up and down the steps on her own. But I think I have an idea of how Post Traumatic Stress Disorder works. I have to watch her when she goes up the stairs.

Now she does some fairly simple cooking – rice, steamed vegetables, microwaving a prepared meal. And we are at that spot I described as the grindingly slow stage of her recovery.

Do I jump up and down every day thanking God that it happened? Certainly not. And I still might hit someone if they walk up to me and tell me that “…all things work together for those who love the Lord…” I had enough trouble dealing with one of the ministers of doofus who came by rehab and pretty much told my wife to claim her healing. I guess she meant well.

Here is what has become a constant question for us: Whenwe travel, are we going to take the walker or the wheelchair? Being the determined woman she is, she usually, and sometimes foolishly picks the walker.

All in all, I am grateful for where she is in her recovery and I often remind her of where she was when she gets frustrated.

Truth be told, we talk a lot more than we did. And yeah, I listen a lot more.

For It Is the Power of Entertainment Unto…Unto…Entertainment

February 19, 2012

Which is better: A “dull” preacher who presents the Gospel accurately and in the power of the Spirit, or a really entertaining kind of guy who maybe gives a muddled presentation of the Gospel, kind of?

I’m sure you would agree that between the two choices, the somewhat dull fellow presenting under the power of the Spirit of God is the way to go. Why? Because the Bible says in Romans 1:16that the Gospel is the power of God unto salvation. Unfortunately, people ignore this and use entertainment in place of the Spirit of God.

Here’s what happens when you try to appeal to the young flesh:

A tip o’the hat to Phil for reminding me of this. My not so bright but still Vastly Overpriced Webmaster is STILL trying to get my stuff off the old sever. But I digress.

Do I have to augment the Gospel to make it attractive? No. To the unsaved, to those whose hearts God has not opened (Acts 13:48) the Gospel is a horror, it is the smell of death (2 Cor 2:15, 16). Nothing I do is going to make the message attractive. Sure, people will come around because they are entertained. And yes, people will come back and fill the pews. And they will continue to fill the pews as long as I continue to keep them entertained and avoid icky subjects like sin, judgment, and repentance.

But the only thing you will have done is mix a bunch of the unsaved with some nominally authentic Christians. And the only way you will keep those unsaved, unrepentant enemies of God (Romans 8:7) there is to avoid preaching the Gospel and continue to keep them entertained, thus starving the Christians.

Do you think you have to make the Gospel exciting and attractive to draw the youth? A couple of churches (First Baptist Church of Glenarden on the Kettering [FBCGotK] and Zion Church (a First Baptist wannabee)) have a program called Merge. Here’s an article from the Washington Post from about a year ago. I suspect the head preachers imagine that doing this is going to draw boys and girls into the church. And they are right. These events will draw teens and young adults into the church, the church building. And notice what one of the young men says: He would rather be involved in Merge than to be in church. So explain to me how that works. How will this young man mature if his only contact with folks is in what really looks like a rock concert? How do any of the youth at the event come to any understanding of salvation? I’ve listened to some of Staton’s sermons. If Jenkins and company are depending on Billy Staton to present the Gospel, and to present it effectively, then the children being ministered to are not actually being ministered to. They are being entertained – and misled.

While I’m probably being unfair and taking a single photo grossly out of context (but somehow I don’t think so), here is some of what went on in the “service.” And it’s true that I’m jealous of the lad because I haven’t been able to jump like that for at least thirty years. If I were to try that now, I would likely jam my pelvis into my spleen.

Did Paul have a night of entertainment using a multi-million dollar sound system, high def LCD screens, and a cutting edge light and video system? Last time I checked (take a look anywhere within Acts) and you just won’t see anything like that. And I guarantee you it wasn’t because he didn’t have electiricity. He didn’t use entertainment as a “witnessing tool” because he understood that the Gospel, not entertainment, is the power unto salvation.

You say you can’t engage people if all you do is present the Gospel? Then why in the world did the Jews get so…um…engaged with Stephen that they stoned him? (Acts 7) That seems pretty engaged – and enraged. Look at the transcript of what he said. He pretty much provided a history lesson, with the climax being an accusation of killing the very person they were waiting for.

And why did over three thousand people come to Christ through Peter’s rather ordinary presentation (Acts 2:14-41)? It seems the only thing he did was present scripture and a history of Israel in her disobedience. No great entertainment value there. Peter, when he was witnessing to a high-powered roman officer, just gave the Gospel (Acts10:34-44). As a result, the house was turned out. There was no Greek theatre troupe, no choir, no nothing.

So what am I saying? One of the tools the pimps use to increase the size of their congregation is to provide their sheeple, and their potential sheeple with slammin’ entertainment; praise and worship entertainment, preaching entertainment, and special occasion entertainment. They don’t deliver hard hitting sermons. They don’t seriously challenge the congregation. They don’t competently expound on the Scriptures. Instead, they twist the Scriptures to appeal to the sheeple’s greed and fears. They twist them to convince the sheeple to give them money.

Present the Gospel, the whole Gospel, in season and out. Present the power of God not the talents of singers, dancers and video unit operators. It’s not about high-powered lighting or dynamic graphics. It’s about Spirit-powered preaching. It’s the edification of the congregation. And of course, pimps can’t edify without losing their victims. And if they lose their victims, they lose their Lexuses Lexes Lexii their expensive luxury cars. And it wouldn’t do for them to drive the same kind of hooptie their congregation drives.

Try some of these guys if you want the Gospel and not a lot of pandering.

Thank You Pulpit Pimps – You Helped Elect Obama

February 13, 2012

I don’t normally comment on politics. It can be very subjective, and often there are not clear-cut sides to take. But every once in a while, the confluence of piety and politics has such a devastating effect on our freedoms as Americans, that I am forced to say something. Such is the case with Obama and the pulpit pimps.

Pulpit pimps weaken the Christian culture. Another bit of damage the pulpit pimps have done is to make religious Black people so spiritually stupid they actually think Obama is helping them.

Why do I say this? Follow along.

When compared to ANY Republican candidate, the Blacks surveyed went anywhere from 93 percent to 95 percent for Obama. And as of October of 2011, the Pew Research center says:

In a recent Pew Research Center poll, Black voters preferred Mr. Obama 95 percent to 3 percent over Mitt Romney, “which is at least the margin he got in 2008,” said Michael Dimock, associate director for research at Pew. “There’s no erosion at all.” And according to a February 2 2012 Pew Report, 88 percent of Blacks are either Democrat or lean toward Democrat affiliation.

But let’s take a look at the facts:

Obama and the Democrats just finished making a full-scale assault on religious (not just Catholic) freedoms. He tried to force Protestant AND Catholic hospitals, Christian schools, and other religious-based organization to violate their conscience by forcing those organizations to pay for insurance that would provide abortions for their workers (and yes, I counting abortion inducing chemicals as abortions since the net result is a dead baby). And now he’s backing off to say insurance companies have to pay for these things, which means we all will pay for them since the insurance companies will simply raise their prices to pay for the increased costs of the services.

Obama has repeatedly been a promoter of homosexuality as being no different from heterosexuality. He has pushed for the redefinition of marriage. He has accused those who disagree with him of bigotry. He has made it a point to appoint openly homosexual individuals to high offices for no apparent reason other than their homosexuality.

Obama and the democrats have done more to support the deaths of literally millions of Black babies through abortions. Margaret Sanger would be proud of him. And so would Herr Himmler.

He has set the precedence for the assassination of American citizens without the exercise of due process. Yes, the fellow killed was a really bad guy, but that doesn’t give us the right to simply kill him.

But my point in all of this is that if you ask the average Black who attends the church of one of the pimps, that Black will argue you into the ground that Obama is a Christian.

And no, I’m not saying he’s a Muslim. I’m saying the average religious Christian, one “trained” in a pulpit pimp’s church or even a liberal church, has not been introduced to the idea of a holy and righteous God. They have not been exposed to the idea that one is a Christian 24/7 and not just on Sundays. They have no real clue with respect to the idea that my life should be a living sacrifice (Roman 12:1-2) and sacrificed according to God’s standards not my own.

Thanks to the pimps, religious Blacks view Obama as a savior. Thanks to Obama, Blacks are perishing financially. Yes, yes. I know. It’s Bush’s fault.

I considered Bush, at best, to be a faux conservative. He has his own set of difficulties. But the current push to normalize perversion is not one of them. The current intensive effort to make us even more dependent on the government is Obama’s and Obama’s alone. The attempt to force us into a guaranteed to fail medical system is Obama’s and Obama’s alone. Taking a crap on the rule of law is Obama’s and Obama’s alone. And the fomenting of open hostility to things Christian belongs solely to Obama.

Little or nothing Obama promotes as policy is consistent with Christian doctrine. And when he does try to cloak his actions in Scripture, he twists and distorts it, making it obvious that he has not a clue. He demonstrates over and over again that when it comes to Christianity he has no understanding of Christianity and has not been significantly influenced by Christianity. As an example, he is the most pro-abortion president in our history.

Let’s face it. The man sat for 20 years under Jeremiah Wright, a socialist (use the force of government to take from one group of people and give to the group I think it should go to) and a staunch promoter of Liberation Theology. You can’t get any further from life-changing Christianity than that.

Obama is not a Christian. He has too many consistently anti-Christian aspects to his life for me to even begin to claim he is. But I can guarantee you there are folks out there, especially the religious Blacks who will swear before God that the man is born again.

Thank you pulpit pimps.

The First Safe Haven

February 12, 2012

The First Safe Haven.  A place to go to avoid getting pimped.

Starving the Ones Who Depend on You

February 10, 2012

I had to really think about displaying the image you see. It was painful to view and it shows some of the evil men are willing to inflict on creatures that depend on us for care and protection. And you know the owners, the people who have taken responsibility for them, are the source of the misery for these poor creatures.

A couple of days ago, I saw a miserable and emaciated creature on one of the Metro trains (for you outside the DC area, Metro is the subway system that runs throughout the Washington metropolitan area). But this miserable creature was a human. And he was emaciated as a result of being a member of First Baptist Church of Glenarden on the Kettering (FBCGotK) where no one has fed him any real meat of the Word (Heb 5:12-13) and where they have abused him spiritually for about the last 15 years.

John has taught them how to “hear God’s voice.” And I can assure you, none of his advice included memorizing His word, binding it to our frontals, so to speak (Deut 6:8). None of his advice has included the idea of being transformed by the renewing of one’s mind (Romans 12:1,2) with clear biblical advice on how to make that transformation. It all has to do with vision, subjective prompting and circumstance.

So what? you ask. So what if the people get to sit in the congregation fat, dumb, and happy while John K. Jenkins prances around on the stage and brings in other high priced speakers to prance around when he needs a break? So what if he doesn’t train the congregation to exercise discernment, real, Bible-based discernment in their daily lives (Heb 5:14)? So what if they have been taught that John K. Jenkins is God’s mouthpiece for them?

The first thing is they are neither spiritually fat nor happy. As an example, the family of the poor creature I mentioned earlier is being destroyed, and is being destroyed because the lack of care John K. Jenkins and his assistant shepherds have given to their flock.

The poor creature’s wife has been convinced it’s okay to pursue ordination. She feels it in her spirit. And because my friend, the poor miserable creature, has been so negligent in learning the Word and developing wisdom based on the Word, he is not able to tell his wife that she should not pursue ordination. But it gets worse.

Part of the whole licensing/ordaining thing at FBCGotK is establishing yourself in the pecking order. You have to work in one of the 5,738 “ministries” there at FBCGotK. Once you reach a certain status, you then get to sit up on the stage, to the pastor’s left. You can see the band of preacher wannabees in some of the videos.

Unfortunately, the poor creature’s wife couldn’t seem to make it to the stage. And the ordaining thing definitely wasn’t happening. And here’s the tragic part. Since she knows God wants her ordained and off doing reverendy stuff, she left FBCGotK for The Praise Immanuel Mighty Prince (henceforth referred to as the PIMP church) to pursue ordination. The fact that the PIMP church is led by an Apostle wasn’t off-putting to the wife. God wants her there because it’s there she can get her ordination.

The husband doesn’t like the fact that his wife has left FBCGotK. But here’s the sad part, he doesn’t know how to state his case without judging his wife’s decision. After all, who is he to say God didn’t direct her to leave FBCGotK? If God gives you a vision, you don’t judge it by the Word. You pursue it, because it must be from God. Right?

But here is the saddest kicker. He doesn’t like the fact that the bozo at PIMP Church calls himself an apostle. He thinks it’s ridiculous that the man have such a title. But when I reminded him that John K. Jenkins has brought in men who refer to themselves as apostles (specifically Apostle Louis Greenup) he responded with the classic “I don’t remember that.”

As you would expect, some measure of conflict has set up between him and his wife. They are giving money to the pastor of PIMP church, and his wife is off getting involved in a “ministry” run by a charlatan. They are attending two different churches and the poor miserable creature doesn’t understand his responsibilities in the whole thing. His family has been split and he doesn’t have the tools to even begin to repair the split.

I can guarantee you the PIMP apostle isn’t going to ask her to return to FBCGotK (my friend already asked him to counsel her to do so) and his wife, because she has been so badly trained, isn’t going to go back. And there is no end in sight. She is pursuing a goal contrary to Scripture. And he is the first one to say he shouldn’t judge.

As a result, the poor miserable creature is left to try to figure out what happened. And worse, the man has no tools with which to address the problem. He doesn’t know the Word. He has no standards outside of what John K. Jenkins has taught him, and he has no way of discerning the true spirit of God as opposed to the spirit of his own desire (James 4:3). He doesn’t know how to judge righteous judgment. He doesn’t even know that there is such a thing as righteous judgment (John 7:24). His abusive master, John K. Jenkins, has starved him. His wife’s abusive master, Apostle Mo Money, is starving her.

My friend is as spiritually abused and emaciated as the dogs and cats you see in the SPCA commercials. But worse than that, he has become so accustomed to the bad food and mistreatment he has experienced that he is no longer interested in the meat of the Gospel.

Abomination Update – Fast Eddie Aplogizes…to the Jewish Anti-defamation League

February 6, 2012

Apparently Eddie Long apologized to the Jewish community for the coronation ceremony during which he was wrapped in the Torah.

Here are the details from CNN.

At the same time, I wonder if he apologized to his congregation for the disgrace he brought to Club Newbirth and to Christianity in general. In fact, I wonder if they have even figured out why the whole thing was so busted to begin with.

Not a King – An Idol

February 5, 2012

I’m sure by now you have seen the abomination of a Club Newbirth video. The height of the abomination was when the “rabbi” (my apologies to the authentic rabbis out there) wrapped Fast Eddie in the Torah. Some have said it would have been more appropriate to use Charmin, but that borders on a personal attack. And we here at Pulpit Pimps dot Org frown upon personal attacks. Generally.

At first, I was going to rail against Fast Eddie, Rabbi Moronowitz, and the Elders of the Club Newbirth. But then I thought about it. And being a TV and movie fan, I couldn’t help but think about it in terms of movies.

The whole thing was eerily reminiscent of a scene from “The Ten Commandments” with Charlton Heston and Edward G. Robinson (“Yeah, where’s your God now Moses?”). I’m sure you religious people out there saw the movie because I keep hearing you quote the movie instead of the Bible. And ABC shows it every Easter Weekend. Well, here is a case of life imitating art.

When you get right down to it, this sorry affair isn’t about Fast Eddie, the rabbi, or the elders. It’s about the congregation. At best, Rabbi Moronowitz is playing the part of Edward G. Robison in the movie. Fast Eddie is the dumb ox (Hey! He’s the one who wears the muscle shirts all the time).

Again, this isn’t about Fast Eddie. If you watch the Newbirth video, the congregation is almost foaming at the mouth when the rabbi presents Fast Eddie to them. They were dancing around like the Israelites in the movie. The elders were even carrying Fast Eddie on their shoulders (Around 3:43 in the movie clip). They’re not as svelte as the extras in the movie, but they are just as deceived.

And of course the results of following after the false god is shown in this clip.

Why do I rail against the pimps? To warn you about their dangers. They don’t preach the truth. If you sit under them long enough, you will not be able to recognize the truth if it bit you on the butt. Worse than that, you will not be able to recognize error if it kicked you in the…uh…‘nads.

If you are willing to sit under such error, it is actually a possible indicator of your spiritual condition. Asking the question “Are you even saved?” becomes a completely valid action. After all, the Bible pretty well points out that the saved, God’s sheep, will not be deceived. (Matthew 24;24; John 10:26 – 29) They will not listen to a false prophet speaking lies against God. In case you are not familiar with the John text, I’ll quote it right here for you:

26 but you do not believe because you are not among my sheep. 27 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. 28 I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand.

Did you get that? We follow Jesus, not some doofus who lets himself be appointed as king.

But let’s give the members of Club Newbirth the benefit of the doubt. Let’s assume they were surprised by Rabbi Moronowitz and got caught up in the moment. You know, a bunch of old guys who are borderline senile, some young people who just didn’t think the whole thing through before they responded, and some women who just love Fast Eddie because of his intrinsic beefcake value.

It’s been a couple of weeks now. Let’s see if the people at Club Newbirth back away from the idolatry they participated in a couple of Sundays ago. Let’s see if the bleeding continues with the membership numbers. Or let’s see if the people who stayed behind are so blind to the truth of the Gospel that they follow this man right into the jaws of hell.

You Might Be Gettin’ Pimped

February 3, 2012

“But Melvin! But Melvin!” you say. “How do I know if my pastor is pimping me??”

I’m glad you ask, young man. The old posting is stuck on my hacked server and it’s been a while since I put the list out. Perhaps it should be given to a new set of sheeple so they too can at least attempt to escape the jaws of the wolves both Peter and Paul warned are walking about, devouring whom they may. Again, a tip of the hat to Keith Tolbert in Atlanta.

While they aren’t fool proof, there are certain indicators that make it very likely you are being pimped. If you experience three of these indicators, it’s likely you’re being pimped. If your pastor qualifies for five or more, you may as well buy him a pimp stick and a wide brimmed purple hat with a feather in it.

If you have the nerve, consider the following:

  1. If you are waiting at the bus stop on the way to church on Sunday morning and your pastor drives by blasting “Money Comin’” in his Rolls-Royce Phantom . . . you might be gettin’ pimped!
  2. If it’s easier to get in to see the President of the United States than it is to get past his Armor Bearers to see your pastor…you might be gettin’ pimped!
  3. If the pastor’s armor bearers have better weapons and communications equipment than the Secret Service…you might be gettin’ pimped!
  4. If your pastor is on a first name basis with more celebrities than he is with people in the congregation…you might be gettin’ pimped!
  5. If your pastor spends more in restaurants than you spend for groceries for your family of five…you might be gettin’ pimped!
  6. If your pastor’s garage has more floor space and is better heated than your apartment…you might be gettin’ pimped!
  7. If your pastor’s house can be seen from space with the naked eye…you might be gettin’ pimped!
  8. If the First Lady’s closet space is bigger than any two rooms in your apartment…you might be gettin’ pimped!
  9. If you pastor owns more property than Donald Trump…you might be gettin’ pimped!
  10. If your pastor’s “ministry” has him constantly shuttling between Atlantic City, Las Vegas, and Lake Tahoe in the “ministry’s” business jet…you might be gettin’ pimped!
  11. If your pastor’s address book reads more like the “Who’s Who” of the local political party…you might be gettin’ pimped!
  12. If one of your pastor’s cars cost more than your house…you might be gettin’ pimped!
  13. If your pastor owns more cars than there are days of the week…you might be gettin’ pimped!
  14. If one of your pastor’s suits costs more than the total your family spends on clothing for the year…you might be gettin’ pimped!
  15. If your pastor has given his children cars that you have only dreamed of…you might be gettin’ pimped!
  16. If your love offering equals your car note and your breakthrough still hasn’t come . . . you might be gettin’ pimped!
  17. If you suddenly get the feeling that you’ve heard your bishop’s sermon preached somewhere else before (like TBN or The Potter’s House) . . . you might be gettin’ pimped!
  18. And finally, if your pastor’s love offering is larger than the gross national product of the average third world country…you might be gettin’ pimped!